A few years ago, there was an advert on TV in the UK for a pantyliner and the tagline was “for those in-between times”. I remember thinking how twee and euphemistic that seemed – not least because they were now trying to sell us products for when we were on our periods and when we weren’t. Kerching!
Recently I found myself thinking how great it would be to have the equivalent of an emotional pantyliner for those times in life when we’re not sure what’s happening. When something is not beginning not ending and we don’t have a clear sense of what’s coming next. Maybe because we aren’t sure of our own plans and desires, or maybe because we’re waiting to receive something, or because we need someone else’s input before the way forward is clear.
In any case, it’s not black and white, and that can feel unsettling and unsafe. This is particularly the case if we’re used to being on control of our lives or feeling clear and directed. Suddenly we’re having to deal with ambiguity, uncertainty and powerlessness. Recognising that this situation can be a real gift might sound unlikely. After all, few of us enjoy feeling uncomfortable.
If you’re in this situation right now, you can use the opportunity to truly get into the moment. When we’re motivated and inspired by goals, we feel great, but there’s also the temptation to focus too much on the future and miss out on what the moment is trying to tell us. Being “in-between” forces us to stay present. Make the most of it to get into our body. What does being in-between actually feel like? Give yourself the change to really experience the sensations as they appear in your body when you feel uncertain or ambivalent.
Becoming more tuned in with ourselves also gives our subconscious or our inner guidance more of a chance to speak. Quite often we feel uncertain or confused because we’re desperately trying to think our way out of a problem. Just being still and quiet gives our inner knowing voice a chance to speak to us. And if we can stay quiet long enough and really listen, we’ll hear what we need to hear.
So feel the sadness, the fear, the possibility, the opportunity. Let the chaos and uncertainty of the in-between lead you into peace.
Midlife Meditations 